12 December 2010 @ 12:36 am
Colorblind 4  
Title: Colorblind
Length: 4/?
Pairing: JaeSu, Junho/Junsu
Rating: R (twincest in this chapter. Beware.)
Warnings: demons, incest, twincest
Genre: tragedy, dark, angst
Disclaimer: this is pure fiction. I don't make any profit with this.

author: [livejournal.com profile] abcdefghiluvyou


Summary:
“When Jaejoong kissed him it was soft and gentle, and it tasted of rain and tears and sunshine and infinity, of gold and twilight, of eternity, of dusk and dawn. When Jaejoong trailed kisses down his trembling body he felt like floating on the sunny-cool surface of a calm and silent lake, the colour as dark as Jaejoong's eyes, just as bottomless, but Junsu felt no fear.”



Former parts:

Chapter: (one)
Chapter: (two)
Chapter: (three)












Colorblind





Nighttime was when Junsu felt most secure and confident.

When Junsu closed his eyes, with his brother's arms around his body, their hands entwined under the warm bedsheets and their breathing even and in a synchronous rhythm, that's when he felt safe and whole.

The darkness of their bedroom was less threatening in the safety of his brother's warm arms, the shadows less captivating and the faint blue, pulsating glow of Junho's computer no longer a frightening demon's eye.

Junsu smiled softly while pressing his face close against his brother's warm chest at this childish thought. He yawned, soft lips sliding along the smooth skin of a warm chest, before his whole body relaxed into sleep.

His last thought, while his breathing slowed down into a soundless whisper, was a sleep-blurred, though confusingly clear certainty that demon eyes weren't blue anyways.

-

When Junsu opened his eyes, with his brother's arms still around his body and their hands still entwined under what felt like the warm bedsheets, that was when he felt something was wrong.

He blinked, and then slowly -without letting go of the warm hand in his own- sat up, noticing how a tingling feeling rushed through his body, as if...

As if his own skin was stripped off his body. Skin peeling off from bones. But that clearly wasn't the case.

He shivered, looked down to where he expected to see his peacefully sleeping twin, and gasped in shock when he saw himself too, comfortably pressed against Junho's body-

But... when he was actually safe and warm in Junho's arms, then why was he looking down at both their entwined bodies? Where the hell was he? Was this a dream?

Junsu frowned, licked his lips, and rose to stand up, that strange tingling, peeling feeling back around his body, but this time washing over his lower body parts.

Junsu dropped his eyes and watched in irritation, how he himself seemed to slip out of his still sleeping and unmoving body, like... a ghost? He frowned again, now hundred percent sure that this had to be a dream. He relaxed almost instantly at that somewhat calming certainty.

He forced his eyes away from his brother's and his own body and looked around, his arms coming up, embracing his shivering form as he found himself right at the middle of a dark... nowhere. A vast nothingness, but Junsu felt that there was something... someone lurking in the deep shadows of this sad excuse of a dreamland's horizon.

A dark pulsating energy, a soft suction pulling on his body and then the irresistible force to move, to go nearer to whatever called to him from the dark. Something deep inside of him stirred.

He had no choice, his feet seemed to walk on their own and he was confused when his heartbeat quickened, almost breaking his ribcage with the force of a suddenly erratic rhythm. He swallowed, looked back to where his and Junho's body were still lying, a faint glow emitting from their intimate togetherness, their entangled forms wrapped in a dull and not too comforting light.

His throat tightened at the sight of the vulnerable safety in this unknown world of bleak colours and dulled sounds, but he obediently turned his head around and into the darkness again, when something from afar called to him, whispered to him through the impervious silence.

The echo of his careful steps was dull -as was everything around him, and after a couple of steps Junsu stopped to turn back, almost panicing when he realized that somehow he had left the binding safety of his body almost 100 meters behind him without realizing. His stomach jerked, his instincts on alarm, forcing him to return, to slip back into his motionless form, but his body wasn't listening, moving on its own.

Step by step he went further into the darkness, until the soft light of his and Junho's body didn't reach into the depth of the shadows anymore. When his body was entirely embraced by darkness the silent pull on his body was gone, a strange, somehow familiar sound taking its place instead, giving the emptiness without the familiar sensation no chance to embrace him.

Junsu frowned, tilted his head and carefully looked around. His eyes were wide in alarm, but somewhere in his uneasiness-clouded mind he reminded himself that this was a dream and nothing was going to happen to him. He relaxed slightly, but his eyes stayed alarmed and attentive.

The ...rushing, slightly scraping sound gained on steadiness and with another couple of steps into the darkness and his heart beating almost painfully against his tender throat, Junsu's body came to a sudden halt and his eyes widened at the sight of a vast ocean in front of him.

Black waves were patiently crashing on the shore, dying down only to arise anew to follow their eternal circle.

Junsu blinked and couldn't bring the disturbing sight of this eerie ocean into harmony with the bleak and then dark nothingness from before. He swallowed past a thick lump in his throat and licked his dry lips, his body shivering violently in the cold sea breeze which had arisen from out of nowhere.

Junsu stared blankly into the dark depth of the sea, noticing how he wasn't even able to see the gray sand of the small beach right where the water kissed the centuries long polished corn of stones. The water could be ink for as much as he could see through it and he shuddered again, this time inwardly at the thought of the now roaring waves trying to reach up for his body.

He did not know how long he started into the black depth of the ocean, but when he finally managed to avoid his gaze of the swallowing darkness, he heard a strange sound, splashing of water. When he jerked around, back to look at the ocean in front of him, someone was standing there in his line of vision, a man with broad shoulders, his back facing Junsu who chewed his bottom lip in confused uneasiness.

How did that man managed to get into the ocean so near to him without him hearing or noticing anything? ...But wasn't this a dream? -Again Junsu relaxed back, that was, until that man turned his body slightly, his profile no loner hidden by his soft-brown hair.

“Junho?” Junsu's voice was soft and on instinct he turned his body back to where he first started his journey through the darkness of his dream. He couldn't see himself and his brother lying safely in the darkness anymore, their entwined bodies too far away from where he was now standing, but somehow he was sure that...and that thought didn't make any sense, but somehow he was sure that the man in front of him was not the Junho he had left back sleeping in his arms.

Junho turned his body to face him and then smiled, and uneasiness washed down Junsu's spine, a reaction so strange to Junsu, that he took a surprised step backward when Junho started to move through the water in his direction.

Junsu forced his body to relax and stared at his nearing brother with confusion, irritated that there was actually fear whispering to him to run away at the back of his mind. Junsu shook his head, dismissed the warning and then crossed the few remaining meters to his twin by himself.

“Junho, you are here? But what-”

He was shock-stunned when his brother grabbed him by his arms and roughly pulled him against his chest, his lips pressing against Junsu's helpless mouth in less than a second.

Junsu's eyes widened and his mouth fell open, unconsciously giving way for Junho's tongue, which wasted not a second to slip into the younger boy's stunned mouth.

When Junsu finally got over his shock and struggled out of his twin's tight grip on his body he stared at Junho with disbelieve widened eyes, one of his hands coming up to wipe his mouth with its back.

'This just...did not happen...'

“What....wait- Junho?! What the fuck?” His voice was barely above a whisper, and this time he did not fight his instincts that made him take a step back as Junho leaned forward with a smirk, hands reaching out for Junsu again.

Junho tilted his head as Junsu took another shuddering step back from him and then that smirk melted into an angry frown.

“What?” The older boy asked out loud, in a voice that made Junsu's stomach clench because -even if it was crazy- but... that was not Junho's voice talking to him.

Junho took another step forward and reached out for Junsu again. “Why are you resisting me? Don't you want me to touch you, love?” Junsu flinched at the sneer that was the last word out of his brother's mouth. It frightened him too...his brother never had called him 'love' before.

“I...Junho-”

The older boy made an angry sound and Junsu quickly shut his mouth. Junho reached out for him again and this time Junsu let him close his hands around his forearm, his eyes widening when he was pulled against Junho's chest roughly.

A tiny whimper left his lips, before his brother captured them with his own, his strong hands moving Junsu's wrists between their bodies where they were trapped, and then Junsu screamed in shock- the sound swallowed by his brother's lips, as Junho's hands slipped underneath his shirt and boxers, cupping and caressing flesh he wasn't supposed to.

Junho pinched one of Junsu's nipples, and the younger boy broke free with a cry.

“Junho- you can't- what...what?-”

The older boy's eyes narrowed as Junsu tried to step back again and Junsu saw something impossible deep passing and then darkening his brother's eyes, before Junho rose one of his hands and then backhanded the clueless younger boy so hard and fast that Junsu didn't even see it coming.

Junsu's bottom lip split, and while he was falling to the ground with a disbelieving cry leaving his shocked lips he felt warm blood flowing into his mouth and running over his chin to drip-drop onto the ground.

Junsu wiped his mouth with trembling hands, his eyes blurring as they came back covered in red. He heard his brother scoff above him and flinched, body jerking sideways to look up at Junho from the ground.

The older boy crouched down in front of his trembling body, his posture calm and relaxed, as if he hadn't just hurt his twin brother for the first time of his life.

“You gonna be good now.” -It wasn't a question and Junsu stared wide-eyed at his brother without understanding, until the older boy made a warning sound with his tongue, some sort of a wet, hard click, and grabbed Junsu's ankles to pull him closer.

Junsu cried out as he was dragged roughly across the hard ground, and then hands closed around his waist and left arm, pulling him up against a solid chest.

Lips pressed back against his before he had any chance to struggle free and then Junho's hands were back caressing his flesh, slipping under his shirt, calloused fingertips rubbing roughly over Junsu's sensitive skin.

The younger boy cried out, the sound swallowed down his older brother's throat while Junho's fingers twisted their way up to Junsu's nipples, pinching and twisting them until Junsu cried out in pain, his body struggling in his brother's tight hold.

As soon as Junho's lips released his, Junsu started pleading with his older brother. An endless string of ”No” and ”Please don't-, screams of ”Junho” -but his brother payed him no attention, only sucked down Junsu's pale neck to his chest one of his hands still twisting a mercilessly stretched nipple, while the other hand slipped inside Junsu's boxers.

Junsu screamed as soon as his brother's hand closed over his cock, yanking on it and pulling it free, and the younger boy struggled, struggled so hard to free himself, until with a really irritated sound Junho leaned away from his younger brother's body to backhand him again.

This time Junsu moaned in pain as he felt his upper lip splitting, more blood flew down his face while the younger twin tried to see through a haze of red mist.

Junho was hovering above his trembling body, and Junsu felt how the last punch had made him disoriented, confused, so he lay motionless on the ground with his mind dazed, and tried to struggle back through a spinning mist to the here and now.

When he was able to see clear again he almost fainted as he found himself stripped naked and spread open on the ground, Junho leaning above him, his pants and briefs undone, one of his strong hands lazily stroking his cock.

He smirked as he realized that Junsu was back with him and tilted his head, the hand on his cock coming up to grab Junsu's chin the other keeping Junsu in place.

The younger twin tried to fight against his brother, but the older boy only scoffed at him.

“Red looks so good on you, love.” His voice was soft, almost admiring, but so very sinister and Junsu shuddered and tried to back away from his twin. Junho laughed- he actually laughed- before he let his hand on Junsu's chin slip down to his pale throat, putting soft pressure on it as a warning.

“Junho- Junho, please- Junho please-” Junsu choked and then whimpered as the hand on his throat tightened for a moment, before it let go to be replaced by Junho's lips. Junsu got the warning and stropped squirming and struggling underneath his brother's body.

He jerked against the ground as he felt the wet tip of Junho's hard cock brushing over the cold skin of his abdomen, leaving a shimmering trail of pre-cum. It dipped against his navel, as Junho bent his body to kneel on all four above his helpless twin.

“You are so beautiful like this, love.”

Lips pressed against Junsu's, a tongue dipped inside his mouth, tasting the blood on his lips. Junho's tongue played with the open slits in both his younger brother's lips.

“Please...please...Junho...” Junsu's voice was frantic now, tears threatening to fall down from the corners of his desperate eyes over his ashen-pale face, while his body was in shock, in full horror and disbelieve that this was happening, that his twin was doing this to him.

Junho smirked against Junsu's trembling lips, his own leaving a trail of saliva and blood down Junsu's jawline.

“Begging so soon?” There was a moment of silence, the wet sound of Junho's lips and Junsu's small choked sobs the only sound, before Junho chuckled and leaned back on his knees, hand returning back to his cock, while his other grabbed around Junsu's right upper thigh.

“I always knew that you were just a needy whore.”

A single droplet dipped down from one of Junsu's long lashes and rolled down his pale cheek, arching up the bow of his lush upper lip, before it dropped into his mouth.

He lay flat on his back, legs forcefully spread, grabbed by the ankles by Junho's rough hands and bend to the side so that his body was free and on display for his older brother. His arms lay lifelessly beside him, eyes and mouth wide open as tears streamed down his cheeks and wet, gasping sobs left his lips.

Junho grabbed his dripping cock and pressed the blunt head against Junsu's hole, before he leaned the length of his upper body against Junsu's, tongue licking up the wet paths over Junsu's cheeks.

A shuddering intake of air, Junsu sucked in his stomach, and then there was piercing pressure and he screamed and arched off the ground, hips rising to somehow escape the pain, but Junho was pressing him down, dead-weighting him with his own body, while his cock forced its way inside Junsu's unwilling body.

There was so much pain, his body was jolting from intense inner lightning, sparks of pain bursting in his stomach, his abdomen, but the worst was the pain ripping through his chest, suffocating him until he felt like his heart was pierced by his own ribs.

Junsu did not even notice that he screamed, not even when Junho punched his mouth knuckles-first, knocking him nearly out as teeth cracked and stuck in his burst lips.

With his blood-smeared hands, Junho gripped both his twin brother's thighs, pressing them forward against Junsu's chest until the barely responding boy way bend in half and Junho's cock slid deeper inside of him, ripping more flesh on his way to bliss.

Junsu was in so much pain that he felt like floating from his body, his mind cut free from the suffering, and he watched how Junho slapped his unconscious form in frustration, before he visibly gave a fuck and thrusted harder into his motionless body.

He watched his older brother tightening his fingers around his flesh and Junsu felt the faint echo of pain on his thighs, before his brother dug his fingernails inside Junsu's soft flesh and dragged his digits down, cutting the flesh before his palms gripped around the thin thighs again.

Junsu heard his brother groan, saw the muscles on Junho's abdomen tightening and then his brother gave a low and wide moan, his spine shuddering and Junsu felt how Junho's climax filled up his insides.

For a small moment Junho was motionlessly leaning above Junsu's body, only harsh panting escaping his lips, but then he leaned back, his cock slipping out Junsu's red and stretched and abused hole, come and blood tickling out of it, before he leaned down again, against Junsu's face with a sneer.

“Whore.” He whispered against Junsu's bloodless lips, and only then did Junsu, who still floated strangely painlessly above his body, notice that his lifeless eyes were wide open, tears still silently dripping down from the corners of his clumped lashes.

He blinked, and pain and fear crashed down on him with an intensity that had him almost fainting, a weak whimper leaving his lips, as he watched Junho -now from flat on the ground and with a tear-blurred vision, wiping his blood and cum smeared cock on Junsu's lower stomach, before he got up to tuck himself back into his briefs and pants.

He lay on the ground, listened to Junho dressing but when he blinked and painfully moved his body to the slightest to look at his older brother, Junho wasn't Junho anymore and Junsu's conscious whispered a long forgotten name, wrapped in fear and desperation.

A strange sense of déjà-vu clouded all his senses, and when the now fully dressed man in front of him turned to smirk at him, Junsu's chest clenched and a feeling so dark and hopeless suffocated him that he shrunk back from reality, away from what was happening to him for the second time in this dream which felt so real.

-

Junsu did not know how long he lay there on the could ground.

At one point he remembered sitting up, wincing in pain, and embracing his shuddering body with his own arms, knees coming up against his chest.

'He lay in a dark alley, alone, eyes closed as he felt blood dipping down his thighs, and pooling on the ground.'

Junsu blinked and shook his head, shivering in the cold of the darkness around him.

'He was cold, and he longed for the warmth of his beloved, for someone to hold him close and make him feel safe and whole again. But there was no one, not for him, never again, as the love of his life had lured him into the gentle traps of a blinding love, before using him, breaking him, leaving him open, and bleeding out his foolish heart once full of dreams and hope.'

Junsu gasped, and violent shivers run up and down his body as he closed his eyes, silent cries of desperation leaving his lips as he softly rocked his body back- and forwards.

'He was beyond broken, his mind wandering, as he silently prayed and pleaded for help, for someone, for anyone to hear him, to help him, to listen to him...'

Tears run down his cheeks, wetting the already damp skin of his arms against which he pressed his face. He sat in the lonely comfort of his own body, and he did not understand, he did not understand, he did not...

'There was a deep and amused chuckle right next to his crouched and depressed form, and Junsu startled, weakly raising his head to meet the dark shimmering eyes of a demon.'

Junsu's head jerked up from the protective safety of his arms, and his tear-shimmering eyes widened as he saw someone sitting right in front of him for real -not only in his confused mind.

It was the same person from those ...memories he did not remember, which he know not to be his own, but which so strangely belonged to him, which so strangely felt right and fitting, even if they hurt so much.

It was the same person...but it was also...

'A demon. A demon had heard his silent plea. A demon had come to listen. He had prayed hour after hour for redemption, and the only creature answering his prayer had to be a demon.'

Junsu's eyes widened. His mouth fell wide open.

“...Jae...joong...?” His voice was so faint.

Jaejoong, his cousin, the demon, smiled at him, and that smile was so graceful, so dark and sensual, that Junsu felt like he was facing someone entirely else than his older cousin.

' “How much are you willing to pay, little human?”, he heard the demon whisper in his low and deadly voice- '

Jaejoong's smile melted into an amused grin, before he tilted his head, pink tongue coming up to lick his lush lips.

“How much are you willing to pay, my beloved, my precious, my Junsu...” He whispered, voice so low.

Junsu closed his eyes, more tears dripping from his lashes. He knew the answer to this question. He felt it on the tip of his tongue, ready to slip past his lips, part of a former life.

' “Everything...”, he whispered'

“Everything...” He breathed out, tears dripping soundlessly to the ground.

“Everything?” Jaejoong whispered, leaning forward against Junsu's hurt and broken body, hands coming up to cup pale and wet cheeks. His soft lips pressed against Junsu's skin, kissing tears away, before embracing the small and hurt body with his arms.

Junsu's eyelids fluttered as he felt wings closing around his cold and bare body, and he shivered, clutched at Jaejoong's shirt and tried to get closer tried to bury himself against that warm body. He remembered the feeling of being in Jaejoong's arms, knew of the warmth and safety in between Jaejoong's strong form and his soft wings.

' “Yes.” '

Junsu pressed his face close against Jaejoong's neck and inhaled his scent.

“Yes.” He whispered, tears wetting Jaejoong's skin, softly sliding down the flawless porcelain, soaked up by a pure white feather hanging around the demon's neck.

Junsu's breath hitched, and he slowly sat up, leaned back a little, felt the brush of wings against his skin when he quickly glanced into Jaejoong's silent eyes and then down at the necklace.

His trembling hands came up, slim fingers reaching out for the necklace, and Jaejoong only slightly leaned back, Junsu's fingers hesitating for a second, before they closed around the delicate feather.

Silence embraced them, and Junsu wanted to wonder why here in Jaejoong's arms there was neither fear no hurt, but his heart, his mind his soul were drawn to the white feather around the demon's neck, leaving no place for anything else to think about.

He carefully traced the outlines of the feather with his fingertips, stopping when he felt the demon shudder against his body.

“Is this...” Junsu's voice was soft, unsure, but his eyes mirrored what his heart already knew.

“Yes.” The demon breathed out, and Junsu leaned forward, his lips gently pressing against the feather for a fleeting kiss.

Junsu leaned his body back against Jaejoong's, sighing softly as he felt the demon's arms wrapping around his body.

They sat in silence for many many minutes, until Junsu broke it with a breathy intake of air.

“You are not my cousin.”

The demon kissed his lips as an answer and Junsu leaned closer against him.

“Then...that what happened to me...”

Jaejoong pressed his lips back against Junsu's as he answered: “...was not your brother doing that to you, yes.”

Junsu wanted to sigh in relieve, but his heart was hurting so terribly, his chest still so tight, and he knew there was something else he had to know, something essential that did not leave Junho out of this. But he did not wanted to know. He did not wanted to know.

“It's time you remember, Junsu...” The demon whispered in his ear, before he slipped his hands down Junsu's body, cupping his ass.

Junsu shifted away from Jaejoong's hands, a frown on his lips.

“Don't- I'm hurt...”

He felt the demon smirk against his lips in amusement.

“Oh really?” The demon purred, and when Junsu blinked at that and then hurriedly checked his body with a jerk of his head, he found his body in a perfect condition, as if nothing ever happened- but he shuddered and lay his racing heart against Jaejoong's steadily beating chest.

Something dark had touched his soul, had tainted his innocence, his love for his precious brother, and it had left its mark somewhere in his conscious, hurting from somewhere he couldn't see nor feel it.

The steady beat of Jaejoong's strong heart calmed him down, and he relaxed, long lashes brushing the skin of Jaejoong's shoulder, before he blinked and noticed that the demon had already slipped a finger inside his body.

Junsu jerked away and stared at Jaejoong, but the demon only pouted and then skillfully moved and crooked his finger and Junsu couldn't help a long moan slipping past his lips.

His body remembered Jaejoong's touches and it was intense as it was insane, but everything screamed at him to spread himself wide open, to bare his soul for the beautiful demon to devour. His chest clenched, his heart gave a painful jerk full of yearning and need and Junsu gasped, clutched at Jaejoong as is body trembled in want.

He heard the demon chuckle, before impossibly soft lips pressed against his right ear.

“We have to devour what we love Junsu. Or else it will drive us insane...”

Lips pressed against his face, warm palms stroked down his cold skin, lovingly, admiringly, and then fingers entered him, pleasured him, warmth spreading from deep inside of him -and then the demon moaned, his beautiful voice vibrating in Junsu's ear, and Junsu wanted to hear it again.

“I'll make you remember, my beloved, my precious, mine...”

Junsu closed his eyes and heard the rustling of hundreds of feathers in the air, felt their fleeting-soft touch brushing his skin as Jaejoong's strong arms gently lay him down on the ground.

It wasn't long ago that he had been forced to lay down like this, and somewhere at the back of his mind Junsu knew that it didn't make any sense that he was willing and ready for something like this again so soon...but with Jaejoong he felt so safe and whole. And it just felt right to sink down with him, to spread his thighs to feel him near, to let himself be embraced by the demon's arms.

When Jaejoong kissed him it was soft and gentle, and it tasted of rain and tears and sunshine and infinity, of gold and twilight, of eternity, of dusk and dawn. When Jaejoong trailed kisses down his trembling body he felt like floating on the sunny-cool surface of a calm and silent lake, the colour as dark as Jaejoong's eyes, just as bottomless, but Junsu felt no fear.

Gentle waves rocked his body up and down his lake, twirls of purple energy embracing him. And then Junsu opened his eyes and he saw Jaejoong's beautiful face, twisted in bliss above his own, pearly white teeth biting down on a dark-pink bottom lip, eyes closed tight, lush and dark lashes kissing the heated apple of his cheeks, fine brows furrowed as pleasure rocked through the demon's body. His forehead was free, glistening with sweat, dark brown hair plastered to the sides.

Junsu watched purple threads of energy dancing upon the demon's skin. He rose his right hand, fingers tracing an invisible pattern on Jaejoong's skin, and the demon moaned and opened his eyes, hips still rocking, connecting them to one, while he followed the path of Junsu's fingers with silent eyes.

There was a shimmer of gold upon Junsu's skin, and the boy watched in silent awe how Jaejoong's purple threads entwined with his gold, how they twisted, danced longingly around each other, braided and melted into one singe colour of frozen sunshine.

Junsu closed his eyes then, moaned as Jaejoong's hips rolled over him like waves upon a shore, and he closed his legs around the demon's hardworking hips, embraced his slender yet so muscular form with his arms, pulling him closer, while he lost himself in the warmth and pleasure Jaejoong offered him.

Junsu floated on his lake, Jaejoong's arms holding him safe, while he deep-dived through the brilliant colors of his former life with his demon.

He passed horizons of deepest blue, swam through clearest water of turquoise, crossed bright worlds and shimmering dark universes, he reached the end of his eternal dusk, before he walked through the twilight to the beginning of Jaejoong's dawn, and he cried tears, parted his lips for breathy intakes of air, as he felt love so great and deep like he had never felt before touching him, embracing his longing form so gently.

From somewhere he could hear his demon whisper to him and he felt purest energy bursting within his body, and Junsu's heart clenched, because he knew, now he knew, and he loved him. He loved him so much. He loved him more than his life, more than anything, he loved, loved, loved him-

Junsu opened his eyes to Jaejoong's face just inches apart from his own, lips brushing as they formed words. Jaejoong's eyes were still closed as the demon was finding his way down from his orgasmic high, his fine brows still furrowed in pleasured concentration, hips riding out the last tingling jolts of pleasure and Junsu moaned softly, lips pressing against Jaejoong's damp face.

'I love you. I love you so much'

Junsu choked on the intensity of his emotions and felt his demon kissing him softly on his lips, before he kissed away the tears rolling down his cheeks. Gentle hands cupped his face and then Junsu looked up to meet Jaejoong's eyes, finding nothing but worry and care and love inside of him, and relieve as Jaejoong found something in his eyes he had hoped to find.

“My precious, my beloved, my Junsu...” The demon said softly, his wings spreading as he sat up and carefully pulled Junsu into his arms. His wings closed around their bodies, keeping them warm as Junsu leaned his body against Jaejoong's, feeling safe and loved and whole while he listened to Jaejoong's heartbeat.

-

When Junsu closed his eyes and his consciousness slipped away into a supposedly colorful world full of wonders, he found himself in Jae's eternal dawn, but his back to the vast silk of Jaejoong's bedsheets, his body facing a window he never knew existing in Jaejoong's eternity.

With careful steps he walked nearer to the window, until he stood right in front of it, it's curtains softly rustling in a phantom breeze, the cloth floating towards Junsu as if trying to catch him.

Junsu suppressed a shiver and took a last step to it, his body instinctively turning back to Jaejoong's dawn for a last time, before he turned and looked out of the window.

There, in front of him, was a dark alley. It wasn't nighttime outside, but the filtered, dirty sun rays weren't quite reaching into the small space between two grand apartment-walls.

Junsu's insides gave a warning and frightened jolt, pure fear running through his veins as he stared at the alley, his eyes widening in unexplainable horror as he took in the dull colors of it. A plain and lifeless combination of solely black and white and different shades of gray.

His entire being recoiled from the sight in front of him and Junsu jerked away from the window with a violent shudder and rushed back to the soothing purple of Jaejoong's eternal dusk.




-


A/N: “We have to devour what we love Junsu. Or else it will drive us insane...” -favorite line.
I wanted to use it for “Love Light” actually, but oh well, it quite fits in here as well :)

Long chapter and smut since I neglected this one for moooooonth. sorry :)






 
 
( Post a new comment )
[identity profile] be-ddelusionall.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 12:28 am (UTC)
My favorite part of most stories you write is the utter mind-fucked, oh god, do it again feeling I get afterward that leaves me content bc good writing is good writing but leaves me used and twisted and sated in all the right ways.

So.... wtf is up with this? Wow-ness.

<3<3<3
(Reply) (Link)
[identity profile] wynnetimate.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 12:29 am (UTC)
Ahhhh! Spot!
[identity profile] wynnetimate.livejournal.com on December 14th, 2010 06:07 pm (UTC)
Seriously, I don't even know what to say to this.

I left this window open for, like, days trying to think of some words that would encapsulate my love for this story and this chapter. But nope. You took 'em all.

Amazing as always, bb. Never stop.

xo
[identity profile] captainmarvel.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 12:31 am (UTC)
OMG I'VE BEEN WAITING FOREVER FOR THIS!
[identity profile] captainmarvel.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 12:48 am (UTC)
WOW!!

This was AMAZING!!!!!
Does everything you right have to be amazing?
*is jealous*

The scene between JaeSu at the end was so beautifully written!
I love the amount of detail you use.
I'm so happy Jaejoong made Junsu remember their past together.

The scene between Junho and Junsu was hard to read.
I felt so terrible for Junsu :(

I can't wait for another update!
Haha but I want you to update all my faves as well :D
Hold Your Colour and Stand By You are so great.

Thank You ♥
[identity profile] abcdefghiluvyou.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 06:06 pm (UTC)
THANK YOUUUU >3< ♥
haha you read everything
I write. iluuuu ♥

Jaejoong is a cruel bastard making
Junsu remember as painfully as this,
but yeah...I am happy too that Junsu
finally remembers. poor poor Junsu
though.

Hold your Colour is difficult right now...
I try to write on it, but nothing works :(
with Stand by you its the same...I'll
try to work on both though ♥
[identity profile] a-happy-twat.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 01:09 am (UTC)
you updated again! you srsly have no idea how much i've waited for this and i love it, omg.

seriously, i can't even form words coherent/fitting enough to describe this amazing chapter so i'll just keyboard smash like craejae kfjgkdfjgdkjgdk!!! ♥

love you. love this story. and you need to update soon, woman. or at least write more jaesu. haha! <3
[identity profile] abcdefghiluvyou.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 06:08 pm (UTC)
oooh so you remembered this one, I'm so happy ♥ :)
you were with this from the very beginning right?
I am really really sorry that it took me so long to
update this. really. :(

it's funny how your keyboard smash contains: craeJAE
hahah. sounds like: cray Jae ♥

thank you for still being with this :)
[identity profile] scarletpeonies.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 01:20 am (UTC)
[identity profile] abcdefghiluvyou.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 01:26 am (UTC)
6 month dude!!! I just checked it and now I feel SUPER bad DDDDDDDDDDDDD:
[identity profile] scarletpeonies.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 01:41 am (UTC)
SO. LET ME DO SOME CAPSLOCKING.

The steady beat of Jaejoong's strong heart calmed him down, and he relaxed, long lashes brushing the skin of Jaejoong's shoulder, before he blinked and noticed that the demon had already slipped a finger inside his body.

Junsu jerked away and stared at Jaejoong, but the demon only pouted and then skillfully moved and crooked his finger and Junsu couldn't help a long moan slipping past his lips.


FAVOURITEST PART EVER. EVIL DEMON IS EVIL AND THEN SUDDENLY, HE GOES AND RUINS IT BY POUTING. 8DDD

AND THIS:


Junsu watched purple threads of energy dancing upon the demon's skin. He rose his right hand, fingers tracing an invisible pattern on Jaejoong's skin, and the demon moaned and opened his eyes, hips still rocking, connecting them to one, while he followed the path of Junsu's fingers with silent eyes.

He passed horizons of deepest blue, swam through clearest water of turquoise, crossed bright worlds and shimmering dark universes, he reached the end of his eternal dusk, before he walked through the twilight to the beginning of Jaejoong's dawn, and he cried tears, parted his lips for breathy intakes of air, as he felt love so great and deep like he had never felt before touching him, embracing his longing form so gently.


Now this is fucked-up. Very fucked up, but then you make it so beautiful with all the colour descriptions. In a way, this becomes heartbreaking and cruel and painful all rolled into one and I can't even tell how fucked up it is because there's tenderness and obsession and it's just. So very fucked up.

PLEASE DON'T WAIT ANOTHER SIX MONTHS, OK? OK. ♥ :)



[identity profile] julili.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 11:32 am (UTC)
thank me, I forced her to write yesterday hahah
[identity profile] baboboy.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 03:57 am (UTC)
I'm so obsessed with this story is not even healthy anymore ):
(Reply) (Link)
[identity profile] bambayahh.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 05:07 am (UTC)
i'm so in love with the plot of this fic, i can't even ♥

sorry this comment is suckish, but really, no words can express how much i love this fic.
everything, EVERYTHING, about this fic is absolutely perfect.
[identity profile] abcdefghiluvyou.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 06:11 pm (UTC)
so you remembered this ♥ :) thank you cutie

I'm so happy that people from before are still
reading this. and your comment isn't sucky at all,
it made me happy and grinning like a foooooool hahaha :'D
[identity profile] heyghurlhayyy.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 08:50 am (UTC)
YOU UPDATED! \:D/
MORE REASON TO SPAZZ! XDD

So, Jaejoong forced Junsu to remember by re-enacting the entire rape scene in his so-called, "previous life" yes?
Oh my god, I feel so sorry for you Junsu but at least now, you have Jaejoong to care for him even if he is a demon.
/sings "It's time for love, somebody to love."
Okay shutting up now. :x

Jaejoong's obsession with Junsu is drool worthy. morbid but awesome. >8D
I like to imagine badass Jaejoong with blonde hair, makes him all the more, sexaayyyyyy~ AHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA! XD

Totally deja vu because in the first scene too, Junsu got raped, calls on for somebody,Jaejoong appears and they had sex.
NOW, IT HAPPENS THE SAME EXCEPT JUNSU WAS BEING MIND-FUCKED BY JAEJOONG. NYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYA!

Okay, shutting up for reals now. :))
♥ Update soon k? ^^
[identity profile] heyghurlhayyy.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 08:51 am (UTC)
oh, sorry, It's me btw.
succexytop. :DD
[identity profile] ekin-hardy.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 08:56 am (UTC)
Wow~ blown away by this...should have read this sooner~
[identity profile] abcdefghiluvyou.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 06:16 pm (UTC)
hi dar ♥ glad to see you back in my journal :)
I'm happy you liked it haha, thank you for reading
and commenting ♥ :)
[identity profile] every-journal.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 09:35 am (UTC)
I don't care how long it takes you to write this, as long as it is as awesome as this!!! I really missed your writing, you have no idea.

The end is my favourite part! You can almost taste the love between Jae and Su. Can't Wait for the next part, but now pressure! Brilliance takes time and shouldn't be rushed!!!

*hugs*
[identity profile] abcdefghiluvyou.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 06:15 pm (UTC)
aaaaah ; A ; ♥ where were you? I missed you!!!

JaeSu's love is cruelty wrapped in purest sweetness.
I'm so happy you liked it ;_; ♥

[identity profile] every-journal.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 10:18 pm (UTC)
I know right!! This period is such a busy time for me at work, so I'm making a lot of long days. And somewhere I got to find the time to write a secret santa gift >_< luckily it's going to be JaeMin smut so I'm happy about that.

Do you have a twitter acount? Then I can follow you! ^^ mine is Kakuhan
[identity profile] radioheading.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 10:05 am (UTC)
Um. This is amazing and I've been waiting for it so thaaaaaank you for updating!

Love, love, love it!
[identity profile] abcdefghiluvyou.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 06:13 pm (UTC)
oooooooh!!! you are reading this? :'////D
I am blushing haha. thank you so much ♥ ♥ ♥
[identity profile] tetsuko-chin.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 04:34 pm (UTC)
wow~ this demon story back!
the smut~ gah~
^^b
[identity profile] abcdefghiluvyou.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 06:16 pm (UTC)
yes it's back :)
haha glad you liked it ♥
thank you so much for reading
and commenting :)
[identity profile] n3uromanc3r.livejournal.com on December 12th, 2010 10:58 pm (UTC)
I have to admit first I didn't know which story is this one... at the beginning I thought that it's 'Hold your colour', but the lack of Changmin×Jaejoong or Yoochun×Junsu convinced me that I'm completely wrong, so I had to check how the previous chapter ended to remember!

Oooh it was so cruel of Jae to made him remember everything! But the Jae×Su part was so beautiful, the intimacy between them so touching, that it nearly made me forget the painfulness of Junho×Junsu part.

I wonder why Junsu saw that certain alley from Jae's window... Did Jae approached him because the time had come finally to take revenge?

[Music]: 椎名林檎 - おこのみで
[identity profile] abcdefghiluvyou.livejournal.com on February 23rd, 2011 09:36 am (UTC)
;v; sooooorry for the super late reply.
remembering my stuff is kind of tragic since
I tend to update super slow.

Jae is a demon, the cruel kind, but we can forgive
him because he is so pretty, hahaha ♥

Junsu saw his life just before he met Jae for the first time.
the contrast of black and white and Jae's purple is another reason
to distance himself from his former love -I think... :'D
[identity profile] takelo14.livejournal.com on December 13th, 2010 08:45 pm (UTC)
bb you're back! *hug* omg I totally missed your fics! You nearly gave me' a heartattack, I thought u weren't continuing any of your fics anymore :D
Loved this chapter :)))))
Update hold your colour soon ;)
[identity profile] abcdefghiluvyou.livejournal.com on December 13th, 2010 09:39 pm (UTC)
eeeh??? :'D
hun...where did you get that idea from?
I updated so much ; 3 ;

Hold your Colour is giving me headaches right now,
but I'll give my best ;; 3 ;;

thanks for still being with me bebee ♥ :)

[identity profile] takelo14.livejournal.com on December 14th, 2010 03:17 am (UTC)
FIGHING!
dont worry, whatever you write will come out awesome :)))
[identity profile] ur-a-funny-1.livejournal.com on December 14th, 2010 11:03 am (UTC)
absolutely beautiful. just... stunning. i-

there are no words. i am so addicted~ thank you so much for updating!
(Reply) (Link)
[identity profile] galgal79.livejournal.com on January 2nd, 2011 01:17 pm (UTC)
Junsu remember all the past. So the revenge start from here.

Junsu managed to capture a demon's heart. Tough job isn't it.
[identity profile] blackcat15.livejournal.com on September 30th, 2013 06:55 am (UTC)
will you ever update this awesome fic again??? this is soooo awesome! ! I have just found this & please tell me you didn't completely abandoned this? T^T thanks authorshii for this amazing story ~